Poker Face

We stare each other down;
each waiting for the other to fold.

You play your cards like a pro.
Or at least I'll let you think so.

You stay unreadable
while I attempt to call your bluff.

A flirtatious remark,
and a heated glance to fluster you
and throw you off kilter.

No dice.
You deflect.
How strange that you did not
succumb to my charms,
unlike every man I've ever met.

I raise.

Your ways are more telling
than the cards you think you are playing.

I'm no fool.
I know the hand you play close to your chest
is shitty at best.

Give up?

The fact that you measure
every word
and every action
with careful precision,
as to not give yourself away
tells me everything I need to know.

I'm all in.

I've found your tell.

I call your bluff.

Time to fold.

Psychic Encounter

Certain times of the year
I feel more perceptive than usual.
Maybe it's just wishful thinking,
but yesterday I found myself
unable to stop seeing us
in my mind.

An out-of-body,
voyeuristic scenario
plays out in front of me:

We find ourselves
in a small space
me in your arms,
back against the wall
you breathlessly anticipating
our first kiss....
and then...

you kiss me.

Deep and full of meaning.
A long awaited and anticipated moment.
Hands grasp and wander my torso,
gently coaxing, almost massaging
trying to bring me closer to you
as if to make us one.

I paw a hand up the back of your shirt,
feeling your soft, warm skin on my hands.
I have a thing for strong backs
and yours is a particular weakness of mine.
I wrap one leg around you,
pulling you in.

Our hearts heaving with excitement.

You pause for a moment
and stare down into my eyes.
Honesty finally breaks free.
"I've waited so long for this."

You, who I thought felt nothing for me
and yet, occasionally sensed your torment,
finally confess to a long awaited kiss such as this.

This is all I see;
A heated and passionate make-out session;
enough to quell our fiery desire......maybe.

But I know all too well,
it would never stop there.

No, I would insist on more....
my passion whirling out of control;
I would find a way to bury you deep inside of me
right then and there.
Finally bringing this desire we've been fighting
for the past three years to to the boiling point
and let it all spill over
in a much needed release.

Arcing Desire

I saw it, you know.

Damn.  If looks could fuck........

That gaze that betrays what you try to hide from me.
That look so impregnated with lust,
powerful enough to make we want to open myself to you.
Throw you up against a wall and kiss your mouth, rake my nails down your back;
Tease you, please you, then ride you hard until you come.

I love you and I hate you
I want you and you repulse me
Such extremes in how I feel for you
only make for the hottest torment.

That's fine, that you distract yourself with safe conversation
in the company of others, but your gaze wanders to me and I feel its heat.

When our eyes meet,
the electricity arcs between us.
Others in our company can not deny they sense it.

Still, we pretend we didn't both feel it.

You with your moral boundaries
and me with marital obligations.
Both of us unable to satiate this primal desire.
What are we to do?

My Betraying Heart

Again, you appear to me in my dreams
as the you I know in my waking hours.

All the neutral, boundary laden banter;
the blunt and snarky remarks;
the mutual respect and admiration.

Once again, you convey a longing
through your eyes.
A silent question asked of my heart.

I acknowledge and turn away,
unanswering your gaze.
Unmistakable tension growing between us.

A real love born of friendship
with a potential for so much more.


7:42am....Get up!
Kids need to get to school.
"Bye honey, have a nice day at work."

My heart cries out for the dream
while my body begins to move into reality,
both at war with each other.

Oh, my betraying heart,
whispering truths as I sleep,
only to have me wake confused.

Love Is Looming

I am fighting frantically
to keep my head on straight.
My mind is plagued by every nice thing
you do or say to me.

Wishing it to be a figment of my imagination
that your kindness towards me is sincere.
Hoping that a stealthy agenda lay hidden
just beyond my intuition.

Please drop the proverbial ball
and allow me to see a flaw
that will forever damn you from my mind,
freeing my heart of this impending love for you.

My curiosities are taking over

and I long to know what lies just beyond the walls that surround your heart.

Is there the promise of your love waiting unclaimed?

Would you dare to show it to me?

I dare you to tempt me and to steal one forbidden kiss.
Reveal to me the secret desires you hold close to your heart.
Let me know the man that longs for me
instead of the one who tries to protect and respect me.

You are too sweet,

and I too wanting

of the things I can not have.

This affection for you is bittersweet torture.

I am vexed by this love that can not be,
and now mourn a life I surrendered much too quickly.

My Imagination

I thought I saw
that look in your eye.
The one that gently asks
if I might want you, too.

The look that
shyly confesses to a longing
before each of us turns away
pretending we didn't both feel it.

In the quiet moments
is your heart silently screaming,
begging for answers
to questions we dare not ask each other?

Is it my imagination
or is there a depth of feeling present
neither of us anticipated
that goes beyond the mutual respect and adoration we have for each other?

Let us continue to pretend
we are only friends
careful not to let our gaze linger upon the other
lest we lose more than just our friendship when all is said and done.

Missing You

Platonic friends we are,
knowing there is a line that should not be crossed.
But I can not get it out of my head
the way you touched me.
So attentive to what I needed....
even though it was a massage between friends.
Your hands spoke volumes that your mouth would not.
How I crave your touch now.

Do you even know what you have done to me?

I have lost myself
in the idea of us.
The heat we might create
if only you would give me reason to pursue this lust.

To feel your hands upon me.
To have you make my heart race
as we work each other into a frenzy of sensual passion
each turning the other out as a feral creature
intent on consuming each other.

I will see you again in a week's time.
and I wonder if you think of me
in the spaces between our encounters,
if you crave my touch the way I crave yours,
if you miss me the way I miss you?

Or am I just your friend,
your teacher,
your student;
repulsive to you
by virtue
of the baggage I carry?